Self-advocacy Is Key
No One Is Coming to Tap You on the Shoulder
No one is coming to say, “Hey, you deserve more.”
No one’s going to hand you the dream job, the creative opportunity, or the life you’re quietly hoping for.
If you want something to change—you have to advocate for yourself.
And yes, it might feel awkward. Or bold. Or wildly ambitious.
But that doesn’t make it wrong.
It makes it necessary.
Let me tell you a story
The year I became department chair, my team and I made a decision: We were going to strip the whole thing down to the studs and rebuild with purpose.
And it took the whole year.
I had always dreamed of launching a converged media program—bringing print, TV, radio, digital, and multimedia storytelling under one roof. That year, we had the right people. The right students. The right moment.
So I started building.
I made the plan. I made the presentation. I held 18 one-on-one meetings—not a typo—to lay the foundation and build buy-in. Because transformation takes time and, in this case, a lot of layers of teamwork.
And beyond the grown-ups? I met with students at lunch every week for months to pitch them the idea. To earn their trust. To show them the future I could see so clearly.
Eventually, I stood in front of our faculty advisory committee and laid it all out:
What we wanted to build.
What it would take.
What it might cost—not in dollars, but in energy, in risk, and in trust.
And what it could become.
I told them the cost wasn’t financial—it was personal. The weight of leading a transformation this big. The possibility that students might leave the program instead of leaning into the vision. The reality that this shift would demand more of everyone.
I told them it meant me stepping down as department chair and stepping into a new directorship. It meant rebuilding our curriculum from the ground up. It meant more work for everyone—me, my team, our students.
But I promised: the reward would be worth it.
And after I finished, the robotics coach took the floor and said:
“Well, I came prepared to talk about a new course… but I didn’t realize it was okay to propose an empire like Jen.”
Still one of my favorite moments ever.
So, here’s the truth:
You can’t wait for someone else to name your worth.
You can’t hope the right person will notice you.
You can’t cross your fingers and assume that someday you’ll be given what you really want.
Because waiting is not a strategy.
If you want it, you have to advocate for it.
That might look like:
Speaking up for what you need (even when it feels awkward)
Asking for opportunities (instead of waiting to be noticed)
Setting boundaries (because burnout isn’t a flex)
It’s not easy. But it’s powerful.
And honestly? No one else can do it for you.
Let’s get started
Write down one thing you’re going to advocate for this month.
Then—actually go do it.
Send the email.
Schedule the meeting.
Ask the question.
Pitch the empire. 😉
Because if you don’t… who will?
This is the work we do in 1:1 coaching—learning to advocate for yourself and your values at work, at home, and in your own damn head.
We practice using our voices, making bold moves, and backing ourselves all the way.
You don’t have to wait for perfect timing.
You don’t have to wait for permission.
You just have to start.
Start here—with the free Values Inventory + monthly newsletter.
