Lead, Follow, or Get Out of the Way
How to Recognize Your Leadership Role
When I was a pre-teen, my bedroom walls weren’t covered with movie stars or musicians. No glossy teen heartthrobs or Neil Diamond posters for me. Instead, I had a poster of ducks.
It said:
“Lead, Follow, or Get Out of the Way.”
Every morning when I woke up and every night before I fell asleep, I saw those words. And whether it was the sheer repetition of reading them or the fact that they resonated with something inside me, that poster shaped the way I think about leadership. (Even now. Every day.)
At school, I naturally stepped into leadership roles—organizing, speaking up, taking charge. At home, I was a leader in ways I didn’t even realize, especially with my little sister watching everything I did.
But as adolescence settled in, I started to hesitate. I wasn’t always leading.
Instead, I was observing.
Again, I watched my sister, who led with boldness. I watched my friend Tracey, who influenced people effortlessly. I watched my history teacher, who didn’t just set expectations—he embodied them.
Leadership is never about simply taking charge.
The phrase “Lead, follow, or get out of the way” is about knowing your role in the moment.
Sometimes, you need to lead. You set the vision, take responsibility, and guide others forward.
Sometimes, the best move is to follow. You listen, learn, and support someone with the expertise to take the reins.
And sometimes, true leadership means stepping aside. You get out of the way so progress can happen—whether that’s empowering someone else or making room for a better idea.
How do you know when to do which?
The key is self-awareness. Before you instinctively take over (or shrink back!), ask yourself:
Do I have the expertise or experience to lead in this moment?
Is someone else better positioned to take charge?
Am I holding onto control when I should be letting go? (Quit looking at me. I know you know I’m working on this!)
Is my presence helping—or am I in the way of progress?
When you practice intentional leadership, you don’t just react. You choose the best role for the situation.
Real leadership is fluid.
Think about a work project:
Maybe you’re leading the charge with strategy and execution.
Maybe you’re following a mentor’s guidance to grow your skills.
Or maybe the best move is stepping aside and empowering someone else. (Don’t forget that important second step. Step aside to let the light shine on those you’re mentoring and leading!)
Leadership isn’t all-or-nothing—you can be in a position of authority or decision-making in one area of your life while still learning and taking guidance in another. For example, you might be confidently leading a career transition, like starting a new business or stepping into a management role, while at the same time seeking advice on something else, like financial planning, fitness, or relationships. (Or the other way around!)
It’s a reminder that being a leader doesn’t mean having all the answers—it means knowing when to take charge and when to learn from others. The strongest leaders aren’t always in front—they know when to shift roles.
Where are YOU leading, following, or stepping aside?
Take a moment today to reflect:
Where are you naturally stepping into leadership?
Where could you follow and learn instead?
Is there a place where you might need to get out of the way?
We don’t have to be just one thing. Real leaders know how to adapt.
Want to go deeper?
Inside the Lead with Heart Inner Circle, we explore leadership strategies, career growth, and self-awareness at a deeper level—with exclusive content, workbooks, and real coaching insights.
So—where do you need to lead, follow, or get out of the way? Let me know in the comments. I’d love to hear how this resonates with you.
