Maybe It’s Not a Crisis. Maybe It’s a Catch-Up.
We don’t talk enough about what happens when your life starts to feel too small.
When the choices that once made perfect sense suddenly don’t fit anymore.
When the roles, the rhythms, the expectations—start to feel like a costume.
Some folks call it a midlife crisis.
I call it a midlife remembering.
Because maybe this isn’t a breakdown.
Maybe it’s a breakthrough.
Maybe it’s not a crisis at all—just your real self finally catching up with you.
What if you’re not falling apart? What if you’re falling into place?
I saw it on Instagram the other day (of course I didn’t save it, and I’ve been mad about it ever since):
“A midlife crisis is just your real self catching up with the life you’ve built.” (Or something approximating that. If you find it, please send it to me!) Either way. That one landed.
And the more I sat with it, the more it made sense. Because when I look around, I see women waking up. Reclaiming. Choosing again.
They’re quitting jobs, starting businesses, cutting their hair, going gray, finally going to therapy, finally getting off the hamster wheel.
They’re saying things like:
“I don’t want to do this anymore.”
“This used to work for me—but it doesn’t now.”
“Actually, I’m allowed to change.”
They’re not spiraling. They’re evolving.
The Receipts: You’re not alone in this
“The moment we choose to love we begin to move against domination, against oppression. The moment we choose to love we begin to move toward freedom, to act in ways that liberate ourselves and others.”
bell hooks said it beautifully in Outlaw Culture: “The moment we choose to love we begin to move against domination, against oppression. The moment we choose to love we begin to move toward freedom, to act in ways that liberate ourselves and others.”
That kind of love? That’s what midlife can be. A liberation. A reckoning. A remembering.
Brené Brown calls it an unraveling—not because we’re losing ourselves, but because we’re finally shedding the layers that were never really ours to begin with.
Therapist Tim Robinson talks about the tension between our “adapted self” (the one built to meet everyone’s expectations) and our authentic self (the one that’s been waiting). That tension isn’t failure—it’s your soul tugging at your sleeve, whispering, there’s more than this.
Amanda Priestly in Elephant Journal reminds us: for women especially, midlife can be the moment we finally put ourselves at the center of the story. Not out of selfishness—but out of survival. Out of truth.
This isn’t a crisis. It’s a comeback.
So maybe what you’re feeling isn’t chaos. It’s clarity.
Maybe the real plot twist isn’t that you changed.
It’s that you finally told the truth.
If you’re feeling that shift—that craving for alignment, honesty, sovereignty—I see you. You’re not broken. You’re brave.
This season of your life?
It’s not a detour.
It’s the map.
Ready for more?
If this post hit you right in the soul, I’d love to keep the conversation going.
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